As everyone knows I am a proud owner of a wonderful sub ‘my boy’!
I also run a secret BDSM group on Facebook. I made this group so people may join express themselves freely without worry of judgement. Also to meet other like minded people. A group where all can freely be themselves.
And of course naturally you will have subs join this group. Some are strong willed and understand that I am just an administrator. Than there are some who are so needy but respectful your not real sure how to handle them without hurting them. My problem is I have way to big of a heart and would feel horrible if I hurt an innocent sub. Also another draw back is my lack of experience in being a Mistress (work in progress). I have been going on my instincts as well as what knowledge I have gained so far. But still not enough (for me) to not worry about handling a sub who is looking at me for the wrong reasons. Even when I have politely told him, I am not nor will I ever be his Mistress. I suppose what I am saying is it bothers me, it bothers me that because of my lack of knowledge I don’t feel confident enough to direct this sub in the proper direction without hurting him. (That is extremely hard for me to admit) but I refuse to do something I know not how to do. I could ineptly damage this sub.
Sighs so I ask, how do you gently let them down without also damaging your own confidence?
I know I still have many years to get where I want to be. I still have many years to build myself up. I’m ok with this does it annoy me? Well yes sometimes but I believe that is a natural thing to feel at times. I have also been blessed with a sub who fits perfectly to me and where I am at right now. Not only is he my sub but he is also helping me along my journey and he will never know how very much that means to me! He is such a beautiful person, a very handsome boy! As well as my confident, my protector, my fountain of knowledge! He is the ying to my yang! Smiles. Ok I am a bit proud what can a girl say!!!! ?
Anyway back to the subject, how do you let down an innocent sub? Also are we (Mistresses) really that far and few in-between? I get bombarded by e-mail as well as my latest situation with subs. Some innocent some not so innocent. It just boggles my brain that there are only a handful of us. I mean I see them on sites everywhere! So are they not true Dommes as well? I am just stumped.
I just don’t understand how someone can claim to be something but they are portraying themselves falsely. (You learn hard lessons in the journey of life. But learning from these mistakes is what makes you a better person) I mean isn’t that alot of work! You would have to tell lies as well as remember them! Than make up this whole fake person! Ugh no thank you!! Why would you even want to?! Maybe I am just naive or stuck back in the 80’s. Who knows but I believe in being who you are truthfully. If people like you great! If not than I wish them well.
Just a bothersome situation I had today. I truly wish I could help this sub as well as all the other innocent ones but sadly I am just not there yet and it does make me feel bad for them as well as in myself. ? But I will not lead falsely. It just isn’t right.
I hope he finds what he seeks as well as the other true subs out there. Just please people be yourself it is so much more rewarding than trying to be something your not.
To my boy thank you again for giving me the gift of you as well as everything else you do for me.